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| It has been a while since my last entry. I really haven't use this for a while. i updated my previous entry when i was still in college. i miss college, it was the best 4 yrs of my life. i truely miss the college life, and if i have a chance i would love to go back again. Now that I'm out in the real world, I feel lonely. I'm out there by myself to survive in this crucial world. I wish someone is out there for me to support me and guide me the way thru. Honestly, I am really a simple-minded person and with my personality I am afraid to get hurt and handle it. I alwayz try to pull myself away from reality. Maybe its time for me to grow up and learn the hardness and unfairness. As time goes on, I'm sure one day it'll all become clear to me (lets hope). In this entry, I would like to thank to few ppl that are/were truely imp. to me. This entry is dedicate to you!!  My parents: of course dont really need to say anything, because there is no word that I can describe how thankful I'm. You will alwayz be there for me NO MATTER WAHT! Dan: you were my true love. I'll keep the 4 yrs of memories that I had with you for rest of my life. It was you who brightened my college life and brought it so memoriable. You were always there for me when I needed you. I still remember it was during my freshman year, you were helping me study for my pre-calc exam till very late. And I aced that exam. RemembeR? well you were playing vid games. LOL! But you helped me most of it. That was just a very small example, but I didn't know how I could surivie my college life w/o you. I want to thank you you were in my life and always be there for me. Now that everything is over, I just wish time will heal everything. And I'll always remember you w/o any doubt and I'll be fine because I'm becoming more independent. Finally, I dont need you by my side because I'm a big gilr now taht I can live on my own. But always remember that I'll always miss you. Nancy: omg YOU ARE THE BEST! I dont know how can i live w/o you as being my best frnd forever! Susan: honey... you are just too funnie! you always crack me up! I alwayz have a great time when I'm with you. YOu just made my day. and i love to go shopping with her because I can never get anything when I went to shopping with you. So you save me money! LOL! I miss the good old times when you slept ova at my apt and always showed me SJ vids on youtube. It was just great! Winnie: you are my lover! muah... you are such a swtie! Thank you for your kindness :) Many more.... I am sorry i cant write out everything. But I'm still thankful that you became part of my life. Shout out to: Lana, Yi, Amanda, TJ, Eddie, Danny, Jason, Andy, Christine Ng, Christine Coyne... And all my frnds in China, they are so great to me as well. I LOVE YOU ALL!  I'm so glad that you guys are always here for me. :) P.S i'm sure i have so many grammatical errors in here. But i'm realli too lazy to correct them. so just bare with me here. THX :) | | |
| it has been a while...since last sept. well.. abt another 3 months, i'm gonna graduate soon. so not ready, cuz i dont even have a job yet. why is so hard to find a freaking job, i feel i am such a loser. i tried so hard, but seems lyk i am so useless in this world that not one company wants me.  i envy to the ppl who got a job already so much. ppl kept telling me the job mrkt is bad, then i was like.. if the job mrkt is bad, then how come u find a job but i cant?! maybe cuz my major? i have been stress so much lately, as graudation gets closer., more worry i get. then my parents will bitch at me, and i will bring shame to the family. i'm a loser who cant find a god damn job. i wont become success in the future, i will just work at the mcdonald and live in a dumpster. OMG, wut if dat realli happens? sigh~ there r so many times that i wanna give up. but if i dont have a job, then i will be screw FOR LIFE! anyone who is nice to me, plz find me a job. omg i sound so desperate!  | | |
| school starts on Sept 4th!!!  | | |
| LIFE SUX!!!  Happy Birthday to my ONLY cousin! I LOVE HER AND MISS HER! I hope she is gonna have a great birthday on the other side of the world (Shanghai)!!  | | |
| My last entry was updated back in April? i dont remember... well.. not dat important.. n e wayz.. I am at work now, VERY BORING!!! so, i decided to update my entry. Summer has been ok so far. Pretty fulfill, work everyday from 9-4, gym afterwards. Eat dinner and just relax n watch drama at the apt. I go to sleep around 12 everyday now cuz work. i feel like an old woman. well, at least getting there. I mean i'm turning 22 in... 3 weeks.. and for the rest of teh summer, i need to find a place to live. cuz my apt now lease ends aug 31. yea. its very frustrating!!! i'm very stressing out ova this rite now... esp my frnd backed out on the very last min. So, i have to handle everything now. gladly, i found one and hopefully i'll sign the lease by this week. i duno. i'm just very upset and depress not only from myself, from my parents as well. my mom was bitching at me last nite cuz my frnd backed out. she was complaining to me taht i had all these times to find one, but why ihad to wait till the last min. Well, i didnt expect taht would happen. I didnt have any time to look for one when i have to work every single fucking day. and when it comes to things lyk dat, why i have to handle everything? I'm so tired of it, i feel like no1 is by myself to support me or to help me. honestly, not even my bf. i duno, sigh..  I literally like cried everyday now after i got home, cuz i'm just so tired and upset!!! and i'm PMSing too. I just wanan get this shit ova w/, and find a fucking place to live. From this whole suitation/incident, w/e u wanan call it. I learned SO MUCH from it. never depend on ANYONE, not even teh ones dat i love (other than my parents). NEVER! Everytime when i update an entery, i alwayz have to complain. haha.. i love xanga! the best place to let me complain. hahaha.. time to go back to work, actually i just came back from yummy lunch. alrighty, peace out! | | |
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